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Computers According To Carol

Wacky computer definitions, A to Z

By Carol Bremner

Computer Janitor
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  • A is for Anti-Virus: she got it from my Uncle.
  • B is for Backup: always look in your rear view mirror first.
  • C is for Caddy: part of computer that holds a coffee cup.
  • D is for Defrag: a popular dance in the 1920's.
  • E is for Email: post office talk for express mail.
  • F is for Folder: before I pack a dress, I fold er.
  • G is for Game Port: cruise ships dock there to play.
  • H is for Hard Drive: going from Toronto to Florida by car.
  • I is for Internet: a basketball has to get inter net to score.
  • J is for JPEG: similar to a square peg in a round hole.
  • K is for Keyboard: I hang my keys here so I don't lose them.
  • L is for Laser Printer: placed on eye during laser surgery.
  • M is for Memory: deteriorates unless I use it.
  • N is for Newbie: a recent addition to the hive.
  • O is for Online: a covered row when playing Bingo.
  • P is for Program: usually handed out at beginning of a show.
  • Q is for Quit: don't ever!
  • R is for Ram: a male sheep.
  • S is for Software: the best clothes to buy.
  • T is for Traffic: always heaviest at rush hour.
  • The Computer Wore Tennis Shoes
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  • U is for URL: short for You Are Loved.
  • V is for Virus: the reason we get vaccinations.
  • W is for WYSIWYG: a sissy wearing a toupee.
  • X is for X-Axis: dig for treasure here, but not with an axe.
  • Y is for Yahoo: often yelled after a win.
  • Z is for Zipped File: another name for zippered briefcase.


Carol Bremner is a computer loving member of the gray generation. Her websites, http://www.creativehomecomputing.com and http://www.motivatedtolearn.com promote computer literacy in the home for the over 50 crowd.


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